Post by dave on Jan 8, 2016 5:35:12 GMT
Chris Paul, November 26th 2002
Dear Journal,
7am
Today I woke up expecting to just relax a bit and play some NBA 2k02 when I got a call from the GM David Thompson. He told me after some discussion with that greedy owner Wendell Shermann that I was going to be spending the day with a legend. I thought cool, I'll get some good publicity and kiss some babies and shit. I grabbed my Ipad, my phone, and called up the team for a ride to this "Meet and Greet" or whatever they were calling it.
8am
So while I wait for my ride to the event I ponder on whom I will be meeting, Celtic great Bill Russell? Larry Bird? He who shall not be named? As I take another bite of my pop tart my ride pulls up. I greet the driver, Hey...Thad? (can't believe this chump puts up with that crap) What are you doing picking me up bro? He replies "They told me I gotta earn my 10 million somehow til they trade me". That's cold I think, but I've got more important things to worry, like why are we heading to the airport?
9am
Well at least being famous around here helped me get through security without alot of trouble, can't say the same for Thad. Man I bet that guy misses Minnesota, what a scrub. They tell me we're flying to California, so now I have no clue WTF is going on today? They do know I have a game in Rio tomorrow right?
3?...no 12pm? Maybe?
Ok, so it was a 6 hour flight, but this time zone crap is messing with my head. I think it's noon cause we are off for some grub. I have what they are telling me is an appointment at 2pm, maybe it's some kind of awards banquet? Or like the Kids Choice Awards? Maybe I'll run into Bill Russell while I'm here, I can ask him how playing on the Lakers must be (and how much it sucks, I'm sure).
1:30pm
Alright, NEVER ever let Thad pick lunch again. You make 10 million a year and we're eating fucking Carls Jrs I hope I don't throw up. I'm told my destination is Riverside, California. Now I have no idea what's going on. If the team didn't tell me this was legit, I'd think Thad was going to kill me and leave me out in this wasteland.
2pm
So here we are...Some run down shack. After many calls to management they told me that I was going to be training today with a former NBA great. Well, that's cool I suppose. Not sure why they couldn't fly them to Boston instead of traveling me all of the country. At least they have a nice outdoor basketball court behind the home, and OH SHIT! It's Cheryl Miller!!!!
After the excitement of meeting such a great player, I'm told I will be training with her brother Reggie (Sadface). Reggie was told that while I spent my offseason working on my all around game it seems I've lost a bit of my touch from deep. They just can't be happy we are winning, can they?.
We begin with some simple stretching (boring), and a little running to get warmed up (like I didn't just play a game last night). Then Reggie tells me shoot 2000 3's from the corner. What? He repeats 2000 3s from the corner. Is this guy insane? My arms might fall off. Then I feel it, a basketball right in the face. "You won't make any 3s with balls on your face will you?".
*Note to self, kill this fucker later*
7pm
Ok...so 5 hours of nonstop shooting, screaming (most by me), and alot of flaming nets later we are finished. Reggie said that he thinks that I have improved my game by at least 15 or so upgrade points if such a thing existed and that the better rate I am hitting 3's the better chances we'll have to win since it'll just give Ewing and Mourning easier looks inside. He told me he had tears of joy watching us beat those dastardly Knicks last sim and proclaimed me modern day "Knick Killer" and asked me to punch Spike Lee the next time I was in New York.
11pm
Well, going to call it an early night. Gotta prepare for Anthony Davis and Rio tomorrow and I need some big time hot tub action for my sore limbs from shooting with Reggie. He was cooler then I thought, and said he'll be a Celtic fan, at least until ABCA brings a team to Indiana (like that's going to happen).
P.S. Don't forget to call Cliff Paul and wish him a happy birthday.
GoodnightDiary Journal
Dear Journal,
7am
Today I woke up expecting to just relax a bit and play some NBA 2k02 when I got a call from the GM David Thompson. He told me after some discussion with that greedy owner Wendell Shermann that I was going to be spending the day with a legend. I thought cool, I'll get some good publicity and kiss some babies and shit. I grabbed my Ipad, my phone, and called up the team for a ride to this "Meet and Greet" or whatever they were calling it.
8am
So while I wait for my ride to the event I ponder on whom I will be meeting, Celtic great Bill Russell? Larry Bird? He who shall not be named? As I take another bite of my pop tart my ride pulls up. I greet the driver, Hey...Thad? (can't believe this chump puts up with that crap) What are you doing picking me up bro? He replies "They told me I gotta earn my 10 million somehow til they trade me". That's cold I think, but I've got more important things to worry, like why are we heading to the airport?
9am
Well at least being famous around here helped me get through security without alot of trouble, can't say the same for Thad. Man I bet that guy misses Minnesota, what a scrub. They tell me we're flying to California, so now I have no clue WTF is going on today? They do know I have a game in Rio tomorrow right?
3?...no 12pm? Maybe?
Ok, so it was a 6 hour flight, but this time zone crap is messing with my head. I think it's noon cause we are off for some grub. I have what they are telling me is an appointment at 2pm, maybe it's some kind of awards banquet? Or like the Kids Choice Awards? Maybe I'll run into Bill Russell while I'm here, I can ask him how playing on the Lakers must be (and how much it sucks, I'm sure).
1:30pm
Alright, NEVER ever let Thad pick lunch again. You make 10 million a year and we're eating fucking Carls Jrs I hope I don't throw up. I'm told my destination is Riverside, California. Now I have no idea what's going on. If the team didn't tell me this was legit, I'd think Thad was going to kill me and leave me out in this wasteland.
2pm
So here we are...Some run down shack. After many calls to management they told me that I was going to be training today with a former NBA great. Well, that's cool I suppose. Not sure why they couldn't fly them to Boston instead of traveling me all of the country. At least they have a nice outdoor basketball court behind the home, and OH SHIT! It's Cheryl Miller!!!!
After the excitement of meeting such a great player, I'm told I will be training with her brother Reggie (Sadface). Reggie was told that while I spent my offseason working on my all around game it seems I've lost a bit of my touch from deep. They just can't be happy we are winning, can they?.
We begin with some simple stretching (boring), and a little running to get warmed up (like I didn't just play a game last night). Then Reggie tells me shoot 2000 3's from the corner. What? He repeats 2000 3s from the corner. Is this guy insane? My arms might fall off. Then I feel it, a basketball right in the face. "You won't make any 3s with balls on your face will you?".
*Note to self, kill this fucker later*
7pm
Ok...so 5 hours of nonstop shooting, screaming (most by me), and alot of flaming nets later we are finished. Reggie said that he thinks that I have improved my game by at least 15 or so upgrade points if such a thing existed and that the better rate I am hitting 3's the better chances we'll have to win since it'll just give Ewing and Mourning easier looks inside. He told me he had tears of joy watching us beat those dastardly Knicks last sim and proclaimed me modern day "Knick Killer" and asked me to punch Spike Lee the next time I was in New York.
11pm
Well, going to call it an early night. Gotta prepare for Anthony Davis and Rio tomorrow and I need some big time hot tub action for my sore limbs from shooting with Reggie. He was cooler then I thought, and said he'll be a Celtic fan, at least until ABCA brings a team to Indiana (like that's going to happen).
P.S. Don't forget to call Cliff Paul and wish him a happy birthday.
Goodnight
